Meat, meat, meat, meat, meat.
You have to love a dark attraction designed to celebrate meat.
Meat on the counters. Meat on the floor. Darkened passages decorated with hanging sides of pork and beef. Oozing and dripping wet with intestinal fluids. Pork snouts gorging themselves at the feeding trough while devil-eyed giant boar, with seven-inch bloodstained tusks, charge any interloper that happens by. A haunted slaughterhouse. What a beautiful and original idea for a haunt theme.
Got an ex-girlfriend that went vegan on you? Bring her for an “Autumn Harvest Date” at the pastoral, bucolic setting of Thomas Family Farms in Snohomish. Enjoy the pumpkin patch, browse through the lovely displays of quaint, festive gourds. Perhaps a beverage in the beer garden? Select wines and fine microbrews on tap.
Then throw her skinny, granola-eating, bitch ass into the slaughterhouse and leave her there. Alone, to face the horde of snouts. When she makes it out (if she makes it out,) we’re talking nightmares, mental anguish and emotional traumas galore, driving her right back into therapy for years to come. She’ll never look at bacon the same way again.
You cruel, insensitive bastard.